Monday, April 7, 2008

stress!!!

7/04/08

trial exam coming in 10 days time...but i still feel like blank about everything tht have been taught...i also dunno hw am i suppose to face all dis...but da worse thing which cause me feel uncomfortable is tht my baby job..he's working in an environment which i worry and doesn't like..i dun like he to suffer even hw hard he work also i dun believe tht his boss will really look up on him...wat is dis man??? i feel is so unfair yet have sumone at the back who will backstack u from the back is da worse thing...anyway he doesn't wan to leave da company yet is all up to him...i also very stress and tired since i need to retake da history paper 3 which cause i have only 1 grade in the GCE exam cert. haihz everything seems so bad to me, but is still need to feel happy cause baby and me less argue and quarrel dis da only thing which let me feel happy...i noe he is stree wif his work but me too wif my studies!!! alot ppl told me tht studying A- LvL harder than studying in da University but izit true??? i feel each level will b harder if not y do they have University rite??? but anyway i need to try my best too coz i dunwan anybody who loves me will worry of me no matter hw hard i will still need to face it...it's juz a small thing than the future i have...i need to work hard for my future and baby future too i wan everything will b better in future so wat tht had suffered now is wortht than more...no matter hw hard to study and get into da University i still will need to success it it's my ambition to b a successful lawyer...dis sunday i'm having dinner wif his great grandma wat should i do when i c 'her' should i tok to her??? i doesn't like her but tht's great grandma birthday is impossible i will do tht since i'm not 'she' anyway everything will sure b ok came to the place...haihz feel so tired i had tried my best to support all dis days and find new job for baby but he declined it coz he wan to noe wat's da real probs tht his boss doesn't wan to raise his salary??? i dunno wat should i say but v had an agreement which say tht if he could get a phrasing from his boss after dis month i will need to treat him a meal if not he will need to treat me a meal...hahahahaha looking forward for da Pizza Hut!!!! yummy!!!

Wednesday, April 2, 2008

missing u...

02/04/2008
today as usual i went to coll..but unusual coz i got headache for da whole day..today i felt everything felt so bad to me...da place where i work it happen tht less of monry in da drawer den our supervisior think tht is either me or my other partner who work wif me last nite took da money...but actually everything came to and end coz of da probs of the machine..a stupid machine cause ppl got suspected by ppl.. and v could c tht hw much does ur employer trust u...actually i dun not worry at all coz i trust tht if u dun do everything will b crystal clear by 1 day so v do not need to worry.. if it's unfair wat for v still need LAW so i believe tht LAW is fair and square therefore i choose to study LAW...i trust da principle...but today baby start his work in panasonic and gonna continue work 4 1 month there and everyday he need to work overtime but still got ppl hu like to criticise him...i really hate dis kind of ppl, dis kind of ppl even a little help also shouldn't get from me cause is worthless to help such a person....stupid, useless ppl...stupid ppl work so hard still wan to say so much...den da stupid boss too likes to cut employee's EPF now gud ur turn had come got tax is better got a bigger amount i will feel more satisfy...dis type of ppl should b sentence to prison for at least 3 years and above to show him some teaching....if dis day come i really felt happy....and another useless is da manager whom alwiz think he's da best if u r da best u will b da boss no longer a manager...think u knew everything , wat u can't done it nicely still need baby to covered useless....
but i missing baby more since he have to work there for so long and everyday also have ot he can't find me and fetch me after work...but's still ok v still can met on weekends....i miss u alot baby muakz muakz muakz muakz muakz muakz muakz muakz

Sunday, March 30, 2008

with his family...

30/03/2008

today early in da morning i wake up ad..prepare to go eat breakfast wif his grandma , grandpa and mom...as usual v ate dim sum, but today v r rushing because v need to go clean up the cemetery of his gred grandparents...after finish our breakfast went back to fetch his uncle den v on our journey...it was really hot since tht no umbrella and cap...hw stupid am i hahahah forget to prepare those thing...but it's still ok but it's a long queue to go in to clean the cemetery and pray since ' ching ming' is coming therefore alot of ppls...but the worse thing is not enuf parking so his uncle have to park preety far, i wake till gonna fainted can u expected walking under the sun without cap and umbrella...den my leg got hurt summore since i accidentally kick sum stone there....stupid dum dum!!!! den when v on da way back it was jammed also i had enuf of jam...haihz...but anyway everything still fine...den his grandma told his mom and him tht dis coming 13 of april his gred grandma birthday so asking them to go...den he say tht his grandma ask me along too since she said it in front of me...i feel pretty happy too since his grandma wan me to go...hehehehe

Friday, March 28, 2008

moderate mood!!!

28/03/2008
today i when to da B&A department for registered my subjects...they ask me for da RM250 penalty which cause from the late payment i had paid...but it seems tht wasn't my fault it was their policy probs..heheh da stupid woman ask me tht did i read the Bursary Policy properly but i dun have it se\ince the beggining of the college...so they can't charge me for the penalty, however i do need to b more carefull since they won feel nice tht i had cause KDU to loose up their RM250 outstanding fee!!!!heheeheheh feel so happy since the RM250 dun not need pay for ntg d...but it wasn't a happy day for me too...since v started t argue we had never stopped it for so long...it seems like v having a 'cold war' not into a 'hot war' yet but i think might be soon?? since long term of arguing will cause annoying and uncomfortable!!! but i think tht i had used to it since most of my relationship go thru dis kind of stage...but still i have hard feeling for it!!! i do think tht maybe i'm not the perfect wan but i not tht bad rite??? y there r ppl still feel not satisfied??? am i tht bad??? all my ex use to say they broke out wif me coz of my attitude wat's wrong wif me??? they r perfect, no worng no spoilt , no tear??? i did so many things juz to make u happy...but wat did u do to make me happy??? asking me question which i told u i doesn't like to answer...i hate answering question which involve with ur family...they dun think of u y muz u think of them??? wat ppl wan to say is their probs...like u say i wouldn't like also if it's happen to me is cause i feel tht my parents are not suppose to treat like dis...but in my opinion she not suppose to get anything from u even a 'care' word!!u care of her did she care of u?? when u r in troublesome who by urside??? but still ur family is more important!!! hw many times did v argue for dis?? i had tired of argue wif u of dis..if u dun tok about dis prob i think v won't alwiz quarrel for ntg...and i won't b so upset too...anyway everything wasn't in our hand is still fade which we could say tht control it....

Wednesday, March 26, 2008

moody day!!

26/03/2008
today everything seems to be not smooth for me...1st thing is da school fees coz of late payment they charge me for RM250 wat type of law is dis?? i hate it...i dun dare to ask money from my dad anymore i noe he work very hard for my education but where can i get da money is such a big sum money...who can tel me wat can i do?? today he told me tht his mom want him to look after his sisters than fetching me after work...it's had cause i feel unhappy yet add up with the fees probs.. but tht's wasn't end of my moody day however today he didn't come to fetch me too coz have to accompany his boss and others for dinner and discussing about working things...but does discussing working elements need to b in a pub or karaoke??? i dun understand??? i feel so uncomfortable does dis mean i dun love him anymore?? but all dis while i never think of all dis b4 even though he told me tht he goin for drink wif his boss...but nowadays y do i so sensitive to all dis??? wat happen to me??? i really dunno...who could answer for me?? should i trust him but beside tht wat else can i do??? he promise me won drink no matter how but today he broke his promise and when reach home straight away have a nap and make me felt worried and sad, when i need him where was he??? when i crying where was he?? i feel there's lot changes between us last time when he c i cried he will feel sad but nowadays i cried will juz make him feel uncomfortable and hate me more...but if wasn't wat guys did gals will not drop their tears, gals tears is so precious but guys will never appreciate the value of the tears of the gal..the more tears da gals drop means she love him more...but each day by each day more tears she had drop she will b more turf than before....day pass by day she will feel she won't need the guy anymore...y does guy r like this??? can't guys appreciate wat ther gf give them??? is so precious to have sum1 love u wif all her hearts which without any conditions...

Tuesday, March 25, 2008

cooking dinner...yummy!!!

25/03/2008
it almost being my usual habit tht nowadays will write down everything tht happen everyday..i do think tht if one day i leave this world at least there r still memories tht will left behind..today as usual i working as a part - timer he came at fetch me as usual..but cause of not much money tht leave for us so i decided to cook for our dinner tonite..so before i went working i have cook and put in da Tupperware to wait for him and have our romantic dinner..no matter where i eat with him i will still feel happy...because i could see him even though is juz a few hour or not even an hour as long he had been beside me i will b satisfied..today v did argue in da morning but i do think tht is juz a normal thing if no argument means tht not much understanding about each other...but i feel so unhappy when i noe tht his fren having a wedding dinner but most of his fren not bringing their gf along..i feel tht if is a wedding party of coz ur gf will also go along coz is ur partner...but wat guys think is really different from gals...i really wonder y their thinking can't b like us???? however, at last he still told me tht he will not go cause he don't wan me to worry of him tht goin home late and all other things.. i feel so warm n sweet tht he know tht i worry about his safety...since tht tomorrow he still need to work of coz i dunwan him to b tht tired & don't have enuf of energy to work...although i have been with him for 1 1/2 years but i still feel tht there r distance between us coz sumtimes wat does he think is wasn't wat i think??? i dun like to think everything in complex but to him everything i think also are complex although he did say words tht hurt me...but i still forgive him cause no 1 is perfect and i believe tht i did do tht b4 to him so, he could forgive me y not me??? anywhere i still feel happy cause he did finish the dinner tht i prepare..feel so warm and sweet tht c sum1 tht u love eat all da food tht u cook!!!!

Sunday, March 23, 2008

Butterworth trip 2008

21/03/2008

v went to penang again but this time was because of working not playing..it was a rush journey but i do enjoy it coz no matter where i go as long u are along i am happy with it..but it was tiring too coz after the trip in butterworth v need to rush to taiping and v start our journey back at 8 sumthing to 9..v stop at Ipoh to have our dinner and v continue to drove back..baby was tiring so pity of him but still he had to rush back coz of me...i feel so bad coz of me he so tired..but the most stupid ppl is da 'useless boss of him' rushing back all late nite and didn't even ask the worker to spend a nite in taiping or penang it was really ridiculous of asking the worker to drove back lately stupid...wat type of boss stingy shit!!!!! i hate him so much..coz my baby so san fu...useless man..but still i feel happy coz i could by ur side baby all da while when u need me.. i love u so much muakz muakz muakz